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04/28/2004: "White copper raps to black coppers' police association"
The deputy chief constable for North Wales, a white guy called Nigel Wolfendale, has rapped at the inaugural meeting of the North Wales Black Police Association (NWBPA). He performed with the group's secretary, Rukhsana Nugent. (I think Rukhsana's an Arabic name. I assume she isn't white.)
Trevor Phillips, the chairman for the Commission for Racial Equality, commented on the situation: "Presumably this was an attempt to get down with their supposed culture. How wrong. How patronising. How demeaning."
NWBPA chairman Roger Benedict said the rap had the support of all the NWBPA's members and that it was a way of delivery a "strong positive message". (He didn't go on to thump a clenched fist against his chest, make a V-sign and say "Peace Out, Homies.")
I wouldn't call it patronising as much as bloody stupid. It's not even a good rap. Considering the quality of the material, I hate to think what the delivery was like. Did they just stand up and recite it, with the non-rapper's tempo of a car trying to start? Or were they on a table, illuminated by police lights, she shaking her arse and him with his trousers 'round his ankles and truncheon on backwards?
Here's the rap. I've highlighted what I believe were Rukhsana's parts.
I'm just a white boy called the Deputy CC / They said I'd never make it as a bitchin' MC / You got it all wrong, cos now here I am / Giving it for real in the North Wales BPA jam
They call me Roxy, or Ms Dynamo on stage / Unlike my brother here, I never look my age / I'm goin' to spill it all about the boys in blue / Show you what it's like within the not-so-solid crew
So listen! Watch a doin' here today / Checkin' what the Heddlu Gogledd Cymru gotta say / Put away your cameras and your note pads for a spell / I got a story that I really need to tell
Bein' in the dibble is no cakewalk when you're black / If you don't get fitted, then you'll prob'ly get the sack / You're better chillin', lie down and just be passive / No place for us just yet in the Colwyn Bay Massive
The Beeb Man stuffed us with the Secret Policeman / It's no good moanin' cos' he found the Ku Klux Klan / Job ain't what it used to be; it's full of blacks and gays / It was just us white homies in the really good ole' days
So what we bothrin' with this stinkin' institution / No love, no heart, no sense, no proper constitution / No-one loves the coppers cos' we're rotten to the core / Cross between the devil and a governmental whore
What is the purpose of a black association? / It's just another stupid race relations job creation / We got our meetings and our various sub-committees / Packed with some do-gooders and a lot more Walter Mittys
Forget all of that bullshit an' I'll tell u why we're here / Things are sometimes better than they usually appear / The New World Order means the streets are gettin' hot /Trust in one another is really all we got
The BPA is sayin' that we're all in the same boat / Black or white in blue, we're all wearin' the same coat / If this don't happen then the lot of us are screwed / Caught up in the mis'ry of the international feud
So Roger, Nick and Larbi will you give us one more chance / Danny and Silvana, I'd really like to dance / To Essi and to Imdad I want to give a hand / Let's hear it for Ms Dynamo and all her backin' band
There's no time for jam tomorrow, we need the jam today / That's why we launchin' our association in this way / Thank you all for coming and remember what we say / Support your local sheriff and the North Wales BPA.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/north_west/3664381.stm The original story - almost the same as this one.
